We love because he first loved us.
1 John 4:19
**TRIGGER WARNING** Some of the topics discussed may be a trigger to individuals who have suffered from violence, depression,or similar crisis. suf·fer There was a time when I thought I knew what it was to suffer. Although I have felt pain and sorrow, I don't believe I understood the full depth of despair until I began working in youth residential. You truly don't know hopelessness until you've relived a young girls story of being molested. Or heard a teen casually explain to you how they were gang raped by 16 men, as if it were typical breakfast conversation. You don't know fear until you've cut a cord from around a young boys neck and desperately attempted to explain to them that life is worth living. Or held someone down so that they couldn't bang their head against the wall anymore. Or wrestled a piece of sharp plastic away from the kid who just can't stop cutting their arms open. That is what it truly means to suffer...
Job 3:11 reads, Why was I not stillborn; why didn't I die as I came from the womb? Job 3:20 Why is light given to one burdened with grief, and life to those whose existence is bitter, who wait for death but it does not come, and search for it more than for hidden treasure, who are filled with much joy and are glad when they reach the grave? (Apologetics Bible) Job longed for death. He suffered so greatly that he wished that he could cease to exist. I have never understood this passage more fully then when I look into the eyes of the children that I work with... I have only just begun the book of Job. 10 chapters in to be exact. For many, Job is a book of the bible that they read when they themselves are going through a trial. I have attempted to do that myself so many times in my darkest hours. However, I could never grasp it. Something about it was foreign to me. Now though, I read it and understand not because of myself, but because of the children I work with. God will open our eyes to His word when He sees fit. I whole heartedly believe that I wasn't able to understand Job before now, because I never needed it more than I do now. My prayer is that God would move through my heart as I read through Job and equip me with the knowledge and armor of His sovereign grace in ALL things, so that I may be able to fight the good fight with and for the kids that I work with each and every day. |
ABOUT THE GAL.Gospel saved, Kentucky raised, dreamer, do-gooder, and lover of people. I still believe it's possible to leave a beautiful mark on an ugly world.
THE GALS GUY.
This is my beau. He's a stud. Click the photo below to check out the epic-ness that is his blog: The War Within.
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